Without You
by takethecurve
Summary: Clare walks out to find Eli on her street with a horse and carriage. Does his fairy tale gesture make up for all the things he's said? This is what I would love to see happen for the Season 12 finale. One-Shot. Eclare.


**Author's Note: I don't own Degrassi nor any other literary or pop culture references. I don't know anything about the season twelve finale, and any similarities are purely coincidental. I just wanted to put together a little something to relay what I want to happen tonight. This won't go as far as I hope the canon storyline goes tonight, but there's a particular bit that I just needed to happen for myself.**

**Without You**

I heard the doorbell ring, and I felt a chill creep over my skin. I felt silly that I had come to dread prom night, but given that I was headed to my junior prom with a boy I barely knew from the newspaper staff instead of the love of my life as I'd planned, I couldn't muster the excitement I wanted to feel. I wouldn't even have accepted a date at all if it weren't for the annoying pressure from Alli and Jenna who didn't want to feel bothered by me fifth-wheeling with them. Despite my insistence that I wouldn't mope, they basically arranged this date for me.

It was not Cliff though that caught my eye as I closed the front door behind me. Instead it was something that looked like it belonged at Disneyworld. There was literally a horse drawn carriage parked outside my house, and none other than my estranged love striking a Captain Morgan-esque pose right in the center. Out of the corner of my eye, there was another figure. Poor Cliff was there after all, standing awkwardly by with my corsage in hand, a thoroughly confused look washing over his face. Eli then spoke, bringing my attention back to the ridiculousness before me.

"You said we weren't a fairy tale. I'm here to prove you wrong," he said. I wanted to scream all the jumbled thoughts swimming through my head at him, but then he noticed Cliff. "Who are you?"

"Her uh… prom date?" he replied, his confused beginning to fade into amusement. "Who are you?"

"Her soul mate," Eli quipped as if it were common knowledge. I felt my own jaw drop.

"Clare?" Cliff turned to me. I tried to compose myself. Suddenly the look Eli was giving me that seemed to say, "Can you please tell this random dude to buzz off," struck me as infuriating, and I decided it was high time I stopped tiptoeing around my anger at him.

"It's nothing, Cliff. I'm ready," I said, striding up to take his arm, giving Eli the cold shoulder. "No soul mate of mine would go to all this trouble to keep from having to actually apologize for being an ass."

I couldn't turn back. I urged Cliff back towards his car. I didn't need to see the look on Eli's face to know that my words had hit him like a ton of bricks.

No matter how proud I was of myself for that tiny victory, it ruined my prom night. I tried to smile. I tried to laugh. I tried to engage. I was miserable. I shouldn't have even come to the prom. I should have stayed home with a pint of cake batter ice cream and buried myself in a tv marathon.

"Clare?" came a voice to my left. It was Cliff. I knew he had wondered off at some point since I had barely paid him any attention. "Uh… I think I'm gonna jet. Some of my friends are hitting an after party, and I didn't really figure you wanted to come."

"It's fine. I'm sorry I'm such a lousy date," I told him, meaning the apology more than I could say. "I've got taxi money."

"Okay, umm… do you want me to walk you out?" he asked, still trying to be a gentleman.

"No, I think I'm gonna stay for a bit longer, maybe talk to Jenna and Alli," I lied. I really just didn't want him to have to escort me out like a child. "Thanks for bringing me though."

"No problem," he nodded before striding back across the ballroom.

I slumped back into the chair I'd been frequently occupying. I took the last sip of the cup of punch I'd been nursing for half an hour and decided I should probably just cut and run. There was no point in dragging down anyone else around me, though Alli and Jenna had been out on the dance floor most of the night with their respective beaus. If I wasn't feeling so down, I probably would have been proud at how much effort Connor was putting into making sure Jenna had a good time.

With the exit in my sights, I made my way through the crowd, passing by the coat check room when a hand gripped mine, pulling me inside.

Eli had ditched his royal jacket and was now sporting the all white ensemble from underneath, looking too much like Eric from The Little Mermaid.

"Please don't leave," he stated simply as I turned to ignore whatever he had to say.

"Why?" I replied bluntly, crossing my arms in front of me.

"Because you're right," he began. "I need to apologize to you."

I raised an eyebrow.

"I'm an idiot, Clare, and you're right about me being an ass too. I fuck up everything," he admitted. "After I saw… him, I checked out. It's my fault that I smoked pot. It's my fault that I used MDMA. It's my fault that instead of talking to you, I blamed you for wanting me to deal with my own shit."

I continued to stare him down. My broken heart would need more than cheap glue to put itself back together.

"You got me into NYU, Clare. You did. You got me in, and then I rubbed it in your face when you lost the election. I was so elated that I got in, and all I could think was how you had gotten me there, and I didn't even think about what I had done to you or what had just happened. I was selfish and stupid. So fucking stupid, and I'm sorry! I'm so sorry."

"Why are you telling me this now?" I asked, my eyes filling with tears, both of sadness and simmering anger. "You're leaving, in what? A month? Two? We only have one night of high school left. What's the point?"

"What's the point?!" he asked incredulously. "The point is I love you, and I don't want to not be with you. Not tonight. Not in two months. Not ever."

"I was all in, Eli. You told me I had to be. I don't know if I can be all in again when you can toss me aside like I'm nothing whenever you're feeling bothered," I said coldly, wiping my face.

"I hate myself for what I said to you," he stated simply, taking my hands in his. I wanted to pull them away, but I couldn't make myself. It felt too good. "I wish I could go back and take it back, but I can't. I can only stand here and tell you how miserable I am without you and how I would literally do anything to fix this!"

"What happens when you leave?" I asked.

"It's college. It's not forever."

"That's not what I mean, Eli. I mean that yes, you're miserable now, and we could get back together and have two awesome months, and then you'll go to college, and suddenly you won't need me to make you happy anymore," I explained, still wishing I could reach up and push the tears back into my eyes as they fell. "Film school and New York will make you happy, and then what?"

"Clare, I'm not happy without you. Period." He reached up, brushing the tears off my cheeks with his thumbs.

I didn't say anything. I was spent. The arms I had been yearning for were around me, and I didn't want to fight them off anymore. I still didn't think Eli knew how much we would change when he went to college, but in that moment, I didn't want to trade the two months of what could be for anything. I wrapped my arms around him, and his arms wrapped around my shoulders, and even though I knew I was probably getting mascara all over his white shirt, I didn't care.

"I love you so much. I'm so sorry," he told me, and I pulled myself back from him to look him in the eye.

"I love you too," I said, and his hands cupped the sides of my face. It felt like heaven when his lips came down to meet mine. I expected it to be soft, but Eli's desperate apology echoed in his kiss. He kissed me fiercely, and I held my arms around his waist, stumbling backwards against the wall. His tongue met mine, and I sighed more loudly than I meant to, but it only made Eli bolder. His hands trailed down my sides, and I wrapped mine behind his neck, one tangled in his hair. He gripped my hips, pulling them into his.

When we finally broke, we were gasping.

"Oh my God," I breathed.

"No kidding," he laughed.

I smoothed my skirt and adjusted my top. I could feel the streaks on my cheeks where I'd been crying.

"Ugh, I need a mirror," I complained. "I'm a mess."

"You're beautiful," Eli corrected me. I appreciated his compliments, but I knew that if I walked out of this coat room with him looking like this, people would talk.

"Oh shut up," I smiled despite myself. "Seriously though, is there makeup all over my face?"

"Just a smudge," he admitted, and he wiped under my eyes with his thumb. "That should do enough for you to make it to the ladies room."

"Thanks. So… did you want to stick around here?" I asked, hoping I might actually get to dance with Eli at a school dance for a change.

"Actually yes, and please don't hit me, but I might've entered us in for prom king and queen… before my whole fairy tale plan backfired so spectacularly…" he admitted sheepishly.

"You. Did. Not."

"It was a good plan in theory?" he tried to joke, as he opened the coat room door.

"Ugh, you are so ridiculous," I told him, walking ahead of him. "I'm going to the ladies to freshen up."

Eli grabbed my hand once more, pulling me to him for one more quick kiss.

"I'll be waiting. Who knows? We might even win."


End file.
